Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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