with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
