Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
