For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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