The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Maybe he injected his testicle?
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Randomize
