3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
only if we run a train.
done.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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