I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize