i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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