You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
