dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
