I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Need sex. Gaining weight.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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