is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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