Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
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I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
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Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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