People in love make me want to vomit
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
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