i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
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