i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
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