Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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