i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize