Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
