I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
