I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
