i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
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