well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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