he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
I think i got beer on your cat.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize