did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
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