is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
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