Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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