YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
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