normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
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