I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Randomize