i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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