You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Randomize
