I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize