He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
