omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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