My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Randomize
