WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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