It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
