She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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