i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
