so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Randomize
