I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
i dont even know how to be here
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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