So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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