Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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