the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Randomize
