I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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