She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
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SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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