You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Randomize
