My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
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