how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Randomize
